Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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