whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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