how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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