You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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