Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
