Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize