dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize