He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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