there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize