this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
