please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
