it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
