Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
