i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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