..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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