just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
