Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
