Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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