just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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