NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Randomize
