So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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