dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
