I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Can you bring me the toilet please
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
