I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I smell like Dick and happiness
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