I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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