Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
soo... how was my night?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
