If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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