I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Are we still banned from the library?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
