ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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