don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
