Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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