I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
