i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
