He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize