she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
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his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
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For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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