Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize