Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
i think im in europe. pls send help
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
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