Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize