Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
