How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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