Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
