spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize