Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
