i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
