So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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