No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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