Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
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The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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