Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
