My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.