are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
